Musicians who know their trade know to leave some pauses, space,
between the notes they play. Perhaps
that’s what defines a musician; knowing when not to play. Our lives are so full of noise that we rarely
experience silence. Do we humans know when to turn things off? Do we know when not to play?
For most of my life, music has been on. Background music while doing chores. Active listening. Theme music for a road trip. Something to dance to of an evening. Always noise.
The movie Going in Style opens with George Burns, widower,
waking and starting his day. Calisthenics,
coffee, toast, eggs, dishes, dressing. Ten
minutes of silence telling us more of loneliness and routine and boredom than
any narrator or other exposition could.
Silence was sad.
In January or February of this year I turned of
Twitter. Of a weekday, I simply turned
off the application and uninstalled it from my computer, phone, and
tablet. It wasn’t a New Year’s
Resolution. The noise had simply become
strident and stressful. Here I was, more
aware of what was going on in the world than most people (people who watched
the news, listened to NPR, read the newspaper) and yet… to what end?
The thing about Twitter (and Facebook, and Instagram, and… social
media in general) is that it’s instantly available whenever you have a spare
moment. On your computer, on your
phone. While waiting in line, while
waiting for a meeting to start, while trying to avoid going to bed. Whip out the phone, tap-tap, and you’re fed an
endless drip of sentiment, rage, and entertainment. Endless.
Everyone has an opinion, everyone is an asshole. Perhaps it’s better to shut it off and think
better of humanity.
Withdrawal takes about a month. If you make it that long, you can go
forever. It’s funny; when I pull out my
phone these days, I can check email and that’s about it. I still have that nicotine urge for something
to occupy and entertain me, but I recognize the occasion of sin and I simply
don’t light up. This must be the life of
an ex-smoker.
A high-powered and very successful sales rep I know shared
the story of one of his more eccentric customers over dinner. He described meeting the customer’s wife at a
reception and she related more of the customer’s character. She told of times on weekend mornings where
she’d find him in his study, staring off into space. “What are you doing?” “Thinking.”
This so surprised the sales rep that he was sharing it with me; still in
disbelief. Why was he shocked? Do people not think?
My new car has a six disc CD player. A 10GB hard drive. A media slot.
A connector in the glove compartment connected to an old iPod. Bluetooth.
The ability to play satellite radio should I choose to subscribe. I can, therefore, provide for myself. On my recent two hour commute to the airport,
I remembered the AM/FM radio and gave it a spin around the dial. The journey took five minutes. Thirteen channels of shit to choose from
indeed. I turned it off. All of it.
Instead, I listened to the wind buffeting the car as I sped silently downstream,
south, through the night.
I thought of nothing.
I thought of the sound of the wind.
It didn’t whistle; it sporadically sand blasted the car, nudging it
slightly off course here and again. It
was a strong wind. I thought of the day
ahead. Of the days behind. I solved problems and prepared. I debated key points with those who were not
present to present their counterpoints.
Naturally I won those.
I travel often in my career.
Long drives, long flights, long weeks in hotels and customer conference
rooms. When I’m in a group, when I’m on
stage, I’m capable of talking for hours (days even). It’s my job: I help people understand the
workings and value of complex solutions to complex problems. But in the hotel,
on the plane. In the comings and goings
and waitings and movings, I like the silences between the notes.
Some of us can’t bear silence. Some of us have never tried. Entire lives are occupied from Good Morning
America through the babble of shock-jocks and jock-talk into the evening news,
through sitcoms and reality-show ejections from the tribe, into boy-wonder Jimmy
Fallon’s goodnight schtick, turning on the sounds of surf, Mrs. Montag’s bees
buzzing in her ear cans, rocking us gently to sleep.
But we can’t all
need the noise. I would guess (I’m being
generous) that not even five percent of us need the noise. The noise is for those who truly can’t
deal. But like a government program, it’s
there, and it’s free, and it beats the hell out of thinking or doing for
yourself. And as a result, the 80/20 is
reversed: those that don’t need are addicted anyway, and we’re left with
mediocrity.
When faced with silence, embrace it. Sit on a rock in the woods. Look, listen.
Smell. What month is it? Which flowers are in bloom? How many birds are there chattering back and forth at 5:00AM?
The world is between the notes. Become a musician.
I messed something up the first time I posted this. Here it is, with all the proper punctuation:
ReplyDelete"I sit on my favorite rock, looking over the brook, to take time away from busy-ness, time to be. I've long since stopped feeling guilty about taking being time; it's something we all need for our spiritual health, and often we don't take enough of it." —Madeleine L'Engle, Walking on Water: Reflections on Faith and Art, p. 12